TODAY'S TWERK...TOMORROW'S HALLOWEEN COSTUME

YES
This controversy gives women a reason to dress even more slutty for Halloween

NO
A Robin Thicke look alike isn't required but it would complete the outfit

MAYBE
This is TOO demure for you and you'll decide to wear two sea shells as a bra and a clam to cover your kooter. Way to Gaga! She's a Halloween perennial.

Hating on Djokovic

I was invited by a friend recently to join him to go see Djokovic at the NYC Uniqlo 5th Avenue flagship store.

Quickly, I declined.

It's not that I'm a bigger Nadal fan or abhor tennis as a professional sport, but I can't support Djokovic's endorsement of Uniqlo's athletic apparel.

Frankly, they suck. Don't let the Japanese marketing trickery of breathable and smart-wicking fabric trick you. But when did your t-shirt develop a brain? When you sweat it gets wet and depending on how quickly the sweat evaporates determines how effective your shirt really is...and Uniqlo's athletic wear doesn't wick as well as something made by Nike, Adidas or even by H&M Athletic.

Having been suckered into the multiple hang tags with the water droplet illustration on Uniqlo's shirts, I quickly learned how it chaffed and made my skin itch when I worked out.

YES
The lesson is unless you're being paid millions of dollars to wear crappy athletic wear, stick to the brands you know. Don't fall for that Japanese smart fabric advancement bullshit. Take it from a marketing sucker.

NO
You don't have to stop wearing it if you're Djokovic. You probably have assistants out there to buy better quality Adidas and they sew the Uniqlo logo on top of the Adidas one.

MAYBE
You work out in the buff. If that's the case, please look into man-scaping.

Good Enough to Print

  

Because the look for the season is so dark and monochromatic, it's only natural that the accessories for fall are so colorful and filled with details. These Mark McNairy brogues with the camo print are a great example of classic meets hipster.

Even your traditional harness backpack now comes in neon, which makes it perfect for a S&M rave party. Finish off the look with rose plated handcuffs.

YES

Patterned socks are the gateway accessories to more adventurous ones. Pace yourself. Try a beaded bracelet, then transition to a colored watch and belt before you go full blown neon messenger bags. Don't overspend on a trend because you can always pick it up at Zara. But make the investment if you see yourself wearing it forever like the McNairy camo shoes above.

NO

You don't need to go out on a limb. Even wearing novelty cufflinks can be a start. So long as they aren't shaped like dildos or breasts...unless you work in a porn shop. More power to you. 

MAYBE

You have a mental disorder like OCD and you can only wear certain things or everything in your world goes wonky. Remember, it's just fashion. No one will die unless you're working in a cheap sweatshop used by H&M and Walmart. 

An Officer and ALL Gentleman

Okay, I'm a hypocrite. You can even call me General Hippocrates for what I ordered online yesterday.

It began on Friday when I got my haircut. My stylist wore a gray plaid button up shirt with black pants and creeper shoes. He was going for a Teddy Boy look the best he could with his pot belly peeking out of his shirt. But what intrigued me most about his outfit were the two L-shaped metal bars outlining the tips of each of his collar points.

The bars were simple, shiny and eye-catching. Like a silver-loving magpie with a sequin addiction, I was drawn to them and coveted them.  I played it cool and coyly dropped into the conversation about how his collar tips were cool. Where did he get them, I asked.

"Oh, I got it at TopShop in London. All the British guys are wearing them. I mean, guys don't really have too many ways to make their outfits stand out without looking like a drag queen. So this is something all the guys there are doing."

TopShop? Who knew? I haven't shopped that store since it first came stateside in New York. But I quickly outgrew the clothes when i started weight training and could no longer fit into the sleeves of my favorite marching band-style jacket. So there's never been a reason to lure me back to their store (aka TopMan).

But as soon as I left the salon, I decided to think about the collar bars before going directly to the store to buy them. I didn't want to seem like a copycat, but I also wasn't sure if I wanted to be a part of a passing British trend. There was also the shame of going to the store and playing the part of the oldest grad student on the floor. TopMan is what Forever 21 is for more mature women. You don't want to be seen in there unless you're accompanied by an acne-faced teen buying clothes for school or prom.

The next day, as I was going through my closet and pile of dress shirts, I thought about how fun it would be to accessorize them with a glittering bar. Plus I told myself that acting prudish is a true sign of age. So I should just go to the store and buy them. Then I had a stroke of genius. Why go to the store at all when the internet is here like a genie in a bottle waiting to do my bidding.

YES
I bought 2 pairs of collar bars/tips like the one in the picture shown here. I mean, it's a dog tag and collar tips. These are gonna look fly on a polo shirt for the weekends. Run DMC would approve. And hip hop all star gentleman is all that I strive to be.

NO
This accessory won't make you more of a gentleman. It will just show that you really really really like accessories anywhere you can put them on your body. I'm looking at you piercing guy.

MAYBE
You have a strong will to avoid the pitfalls of passing trends. But at $4 each with free shipping, I'm only investing $8 on this trend.

Hating on Marc Jacobs' Merkin

  

Just in case you are unaware of who he is, Marc Jacobs is a world-renowned fashion designer best known for his thrift-store chic aesthetic. Basically he remakes something he finds at a Salvation Army which he transforms from polyblend to cashmere and sells it at high-end stores globally with a 800% markup.

For example, remember the cashmere thermal that Winona Ryder shoplifted from Saks? That was a Marc Jacobs.

Seeing this picture of him on Details.com, I felt something that I rarely feel and begrudgingly admit. I'm jealous.

He has a non-traditionally adorable dog (non-traditional because pitbulls are known to kill people) and he is carrying a non-traditional merkin (aka Birkin for those still in the dark) loud and proud. I want both of those things and it's unlikely I will procure either of those things in the following week or months. Nor will I be brave enough to carry that kind of bag.

Fine, the bag isn't necessarily me, but I think it would be funny to use a $5,000 bag to carry the plastic bags to pick up my dog's poop. I love irony.

And he looks amazing for his age. If you can't love it, hate on it. God bless blogging on a site no one reads.

YES
It's okay to be jealous of others. You're human get over it.

NO
It's not okay to steal or kill someone to get the things they have. Hate to be the morality police but both of those things are illegal especially if you're not caucasian.

MAYBE
There's a site where you can borrow both the dog and bag together...pants not included. Wait there are sites that do that. But you have to move to Japan. Ugh! Tokyo has all the fun crazy stuff.

Trendspotting: Pierre Hardy

“As we are not in a period of real innovation, you have to be totally different while also being the same.”

--Pierre Hardy


Sure, Pierre has been around for a few years and I'm probably late in jumping on the fashion band wagon, but I've developed a semi-healthy obsession with his accessories. Not since Prada's parachute nylon backpacks for ground-dwellers or Balenciaga's light goat skin messenger bags with the brass hardware made the pre-street style scene have I been intrigued by an accessories designer.

I want this for my phone and keys

I want this for my pack of gum and iPad mini with the digital version of the Guttenberg Bible 

And this for when I want to make a point comfortably

And maybe this for a virtual golf game on my laptop

His designs are simple, interesting and affordable. The cube print on his bags and wallets remind me of the floor tiles I saw in Pompeii. Plus not everyone wears his accessories so you can avoid that sea of sameness that every fashionably city seems to be suffering from; and a little Pierre Hardy can add a lot of punch to your outfit. And everyone knows that accessories complete a look.

YES
Pierre Hardy has the design credentials. With years spent designing accessories for Hermes and then footwear at Balenciaga during the Ghesquiere years, you know he's talented.

NO
He's not a good fit for someone with only a preppy style or point of view. You need a little French Joie de Vivre to pull it off. #FAIL. Stick to Jack Spade or LL Bean. Keep it real.

MAYBE
You're waiting for a Kardashian or NBA All-Star seal of approval before you can wear Pierre Hardy. By then, Jay-Z and I will be "Off That" and be "On to the Next One."

Falling Forward with 10 Menswear Fall 13 Trends

This summer has really gone by. It could be because work has been crazy busy and I've been traveling a lot; but where does the time go?

With only a few weeks left of steamy days in the city, I've already started dreaming of the future and have given up on the hot summer season. I'm ready, willing and fashionably able for fall. Give me light knits, scarves, and dark colored dress shirts.

To prepare for the season, I've started investing in new pieces that will help me make the transition from hot sweaty humidity to a cool hand look. So I started from the bottom up. With the help of 7 for All Mankind's last season look of 2012 (i.e. they were purchased on clearance from their end of season sale), I bought two pairs of dark wash jeans with interesting prints.

The first is a plaid pair of jeans. It has enough interesting detail without being too crazy. They're going to look great with a designer sweatshirt (trend #1) with studded sneakers (trend #2) and finished off with a designer backpack (trend #3). And on those occasional days when I can wear jeans to work, it will look smart with a turtleneck in a deep burgundy color (trend # 4).

The second pair to help me create a new look for fall is a pair of black houndstooth jeans. From a distance, they just look like a pair of black jeans, but up close, you can see the micro houndstooth pattern. Black on black (trend #5) is a huge look for the season. But it's important to give your monochromatic look the subtle details to make it pop. Otherwise, you run the risk of looking like a cater waiter in designer duds...dud being the operative word. These pants will look awesome with a classic gray windowpane blazer (trend #6), my favorite asymmetrical flannel shirt (trend #7), a hoodie made of rabbit fur (trend # 8) and my chesterfield overcoat (trend #9).

YES
It's that easy to update your wardrobe. It's not rocket science people. The only thing I need is a tapestry embroidered blazer or sweater to finish my fall shopping.

NO
You don't have to buy all the trends that men's magazines and fashion sites tell you that you need to have for the season. Most of it is already in your closet. If it's not, then only buy the pieces you really like and can see wearing again next year, the year after and five years from now. The rule is always quality over quantity. And always think of what will match the pieces you already have in your closet.

MAYBE
You read my earlier post about seasonless clothing and are living the dream. In that case, just update your underwear and socks. Other than that, just make sure to have your shoes polished and buffed. Surely you do this all year round.