With strong Hawaiian roots, I love a good pair of flip flops. It's casual, it's comfortable and it's easy to slip on and off. Hell, our version of dress shoes meant sandals made of leather. And if you were a baller, your leather sandals were bought from a department store at the mall and not from the 7-Eleven.
Letting your feet and toes breathe in the fresh air is a right of Spring/Summer.
BUT!!! For the love of Baby Jesus, have your toes taken care of. There's nothing more unappetizing than going to an outdoor restaurant getting my al fresco meal on when an ugly pair of busted toes catches my eye and I lose my appetite. Toe jam is gross. Discolored nails is disgusting. Hang nails deserve a hanging.
Just like spandex, sandals and flip flops are a privilege not a right. Please don't punish unsuspecting strangers with busted man feet. Make a pledge to visit a nail salon and have your talons clipped, buffed and polished. Your girlfriend, your mama and the Holy Spirit will thank you. Just like a healthy smile or a full head of hair, healthy looking feet is a sign that you are a virile, fertile and well-groomed man who is FDA approved from head to toe.
YES: Please I'm begging you on behalf of the orphans in Namibigeriathiopia to have your feet manicured by a professional.
NO: Busted toes are not a sign of being manly. It's a sign your feet will leave a disease on the sheets and bathroom mat.
MAYBE: You can get away with it if you have hooves or no feet.
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